journalman's Diaryland Diary


Second Date Cancellation - Am I Not Liberal Enough?

I enjoy good-natured debate on socio-political topics for which there are no definite answers.

In a dating context, this usually translates to a mutual respect for one another's convicion, ability to debate and smile at the same time, and point of view as a whole.

In Courtney's case, though, the globe spins a bit differently. When I criticized Israel's actions, she looked at me as if I allied with Hitler. When I said I unequivocally supported ALL basic american freedoms... not just the ones favored by the traditional 'liberal' set, she told me how she wants to badly do away with the second amendment.

When I told her that the Yates woman who drowned her five kids deserves to be locked up forever, she strongly disagreed and changed the subject to how 'post-partum depression is a real thing'. She began to sit uncomfortably when I pointed out that there is a difference between depression and murder of five offspring. Same as the difference between patricide and a young boy's vying against his father for mom's attention. She hated my Freudian counterargument, equally valid as her's.

My dream girl would have loved it.

When I played Eminem/Dre for her, she actually asked that I turn it off. She said she didn't like the gun violence, the anti-gay sentiment, or the way they validate thug culture. She called Eminem a 'homophobe'.

And I thought it was a GOOD thing that she never experienced the NYC nightlife scene. A little hiphop would do her some good.

For a militant liberal to look past how much Em has overcome in his lifetime, how his sonnets convey such pure emotion, and the significance of his contribution to modern-day poetry as an artform is positively apalling in my book.

I said the word 'homophobia', if defined, would be the unilateral generalization that when straight people are aversed to something, they actually want to be that thing. I can't believe she is in an ivy league school... in a graduate program studying a social science...and didn't bother to question the validity of her own construct.

She makes me feel like I'm intolerant... like I'm a jerk or something. I'm very tolerant, I'm extremely easygoing, and I get along with just about everybody. Except for people who try to insist otherwise.

Date #2 was scheduled for tonight. Date #2 will not be happening.

Why, you ask?

It's because whenever I am with her, for me to be 'on my best behavior', I end up biting my tongue, holding back my true self. It's bullshit, but I was fine doing it at least for the short run.

Today, though, we were over IM, and she went to go say the word 'exactly', but instead typed out 'ed zachary'.

When I asked what that was, she replied "You know, how Asian people say 'exactly'".

Definitely funny. Something I even relaxed and laughed about. Until I realized that she would NEVER let me hear the end of it if I said the same thing.

So I said gently... "India is in Asia, too. I don't think I ever heard any family members say 'exactly' that way."

She replied, "You know what I mean... Chinese, Japanese..."

So I did it. I had to. It was as if my inner being came alive and took control of my typing fingers.

With full knowledge that months, years, and possibly a lifetime of notably good sex and equally valuable companionship was at risk, I asked her, "So since when are we ok with generalizing ethnic groups for the purpose of humor?"

She paused for a long time, and then asked me if I really wanted to meet for dinner tonight.

I said no.

I'd much rather spend time at home this evening all by myself than with a chick who gets high and mighty about Israel's bombing policy.

I may go for a walk tonight. Maybe I'll even write another entry when I get home. But I can tell you for sure the moment I walk in the door, I'm blasting Eminem as loud as the speakers will go.


"I start some trouble every where that I go
Ask the bouncers in the club cuz they know
Start some shit they throw me out the back do'
Come back and shoot the club up with a fo'fo' "

4:04 p.m. - 2006-08-22


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